CONFUCIANISM AND WOMEN, Wei Min Bao July1974

WEI MIN BAO July-August 1974 Vol. 3 No. 8

Confucianism and Asian Women, pg.6

EDITOR’ S NOTE:

The following is the second of two articles on Confucianism and Asians in America. (See WMB June, 1974 for part one) Recent developments both at home ( the fighting back of working people of all nationalities against their exploitation) and abroad (the growing struggles of peo­ples of Africa and Asia, for example; against feudalism, Imperialist exploita­tion and oppression) have created a situ­ation which demands that we Asian Ameri­cans critically look at our feudal Con­fucian heritage.

We must understand that the Confucian thinking we were taught--with its rules such as passive obedience to authority and maintaining harmony at any cost-- that this kind of ideology has obstruct­ed our full and active participation in changing American Society for the better.

This second part is a compilation of some of the experiences of many older Asian women. Their real experiences clearly reflect the sometimes subtle but most often blatant lnequality suffered by women as a result of Confucian ideology.

The current struggles of Asian elect­ronics and garment workers here in San Francisco Chinatown are showing that women are important and vital, indeed, in participating in and leading struggles for all of us.

DUTY OF WOMEN UNDER CONFUCIAN TRADITION

Not too long ago at a local graduation ceremony, a middle-aged Asian couple sat watching as their son was awarded a col­lege degree. Clearly proud of this accomplishment on the part of his son, the man turned to his wife beside him as if to mark the momentous occasion at hand and said, “Wife, you have done well. In the 26 years of our marriage, you have succeeded in bringing honor to our family. Not only have you managed our household, but more importantly, you have produced two fine sons, the second of whom has aldo brought honor to our family.”

Our Confucian upbringing taught us that as women our goal in life was to marry and bear sons. How many Chinese Americans re­call the elaborate ceremony which took place when a male child was born, such as the countless eggs dyed red and given to friends and relatives who came to congratulate the father. Because according to Confucian tradition, males counted--not females.

There are many among us who have heard the countless praises heaped upon our brothers when they did anything well such as get good grades or win an award. And of us females, why we were lucky if we were even noticed (and then we were inevitably asked as we grew older, “When are you getting married?”).

Some of us have heard our fathers, when hard-pressed. to say something about our mothers, talk on]y of their kitchen abilities. For example; one phrase heard is, “My wife, why she has leaned to do the most important thing in her life--and that is to cook well !”

CONFUCIAN ETHICS AS IT RELATES TO WORKING WOMEN.

Confucian ideology demanded that females be subservient to males. In fact, the roles that females had were defined according to their relationships to males: As daughters (to their fathers), as wives {to their hus­bands). and as mothers (to their sons). Therefore, women were expected to perform those tasks which reflected their positions within the family. A good daughter was one who learned at an early age how to cook, clean, sew and mend. She learned that her brothers always came first. So if the family could not afford to send both her brothers and herself to school, she was the one who had to stay home, (“Girls don’t need an education, they need a hus­band.”)

Many older Asian women never even went to high school. Our responsibility was clear­ly defined to us: to take care of our husbands and children. And when our hus­bands had a hard time earning enough to support the family (which was often the case) we shared the burden by working outside as well. But with our limited education and skills, we were forced to seek jobs which reflected the kinds of thing we had leaned to do at home-- wash, cook, sew, etc. So we found our­selves employed as domestics, as cooks, waitresses, and as garment workers.

Many older Asian women never even went t high school. Our responsibility was clearly defined to us: to take care of our husbands and children. And when our husbands had a hard time earning enough to support the family (which was often the case) we shared the burden by working outside as well. But with our limited education and skills, we were forced to seek jobs which reflected the kinds of thing we had leaned to do at home-- wash, cook, sew, etc. So we found ourselves employed as domestics, as cooks, waitresses, and as garment workers.

Today .the majority of older Asian women remain in these jobs, which are low-paying and low-skilled, trying to help or totally support our families. Of course, our responsibilities to our families still exist after we have put in a work shift. We are still expected to do all the household chores and to take care of our children. Our mothers are the ones we remember the most from our childhood, Of course, our fathers were there; too; but it was a feeling of fear we remember feeling toward them because they were the stern disciplinarians at home. Our mothers were the ones we turned to for affection and compassion; perhaps they, too, were a little afraid of our fathers as well.

OPPOSE BACKWARD AND WRONG THINKING.

There is an old Chinese saying that “If you marry a dog, you follow a dog.” That meant that you always had to obey your husband no matter what kind of person he was. A wife had to respect and subordinate herself to her husband; she could not demand the same respect and consideration from him in return. As Asian women brought up in a Confucian tradition, we have many barriers of feudal thinking and habits which we must recognize and counteract. First, we must reject the notion that our ideas are not as good as those of men; that we must rely on them to always take the lead and make decision. (its an unfair responsibility for men to have to always decide.)

We must also stop thinking that we can only do things which relate to our homes and children. The home is not our only sphere of activity. We are also workers facing the same, if not worse, job conditions that our husbands work under. We cannot sit idly by when working people fight for decent wages and better working conditions. Those struggles are ours, too.

We must take ourselves and our responsibilities seriously if we expect others to do so as well. But that does not mean that we separate ourselves from men and think that they are responsible for our low esteem and status in society. Men, too, have been taught the same Confucian virtues and values that we women learned. Neither one of us can combat our Confucian thinking alone. Together we must work to oppose this ideology which looked back to the past and not ahead to the future; which promoted and maintained inequalities among people; which favored the interests of the few over those of the many; and which taught that to know one’s “place” was the highest virtue and good.

Instead we must see that we, too, have played and continue to play an important role along with men in building this society. That together as equals we can work toward making this an even better and truly equal society for all people.